What a glorious day!

I had the most amazing experience this evening, and I just wanted to share it, as I am practically bursting with happiness. As most of you know, Logan (my brother) and I have been on the outs for years. I mean YEARS. We absolutely hated each other when we were both living at home. After I moved out, we barely tolerated each other. There was no more fighting, but we just ignored each other. No eye contact or anything. Then, as I mature a little bit, I began to direct basic questions at him or join into conversations that he was a part of. He would ignore me completely and act like I hadn't said anything. Then we got to the point that he would answer me, but not look at me while he did it. At that point I actually called him on his birthday even though I was terrified to do it. I felt on top of the world. Before tonight, we were on casual greeting terms. It was really difficult, because I wanted to have a relationship with him, but it's really hard to overcome all those years. Especially since he was was not interested.

But this evening, he sent me a text message. Out of the blue. It read:
Hey sister. I know we have had our issues, but I really miss you. I miss the whole family. I can't wait till the next time we have Thanksgiving.

Honestly, I cried. And as I am writing this, I am tearing up again. I of course responded, and we had a few passed texts. But honestly, I think this is the first time he has instigated a conversation since I was probably 8. Unless you count yelling and name-calling, which I don't. I know how hard it must have been for him to send me that text, and I am so glad he did! I just feel like life is all of a sudden brighter and more hopeful. Honestly, I don't think I knew how much it was hurting me until all of a sudden I feel like it's being resolved.
I just feel so full of love, and it makes me think that this must be how Heavenly Father and Christ feel when we are renewing our relationships with them. I know that I have not been very good at my own relationship with my Heavenly Father, but I am now going to try harder and harder.
There is nothing like the feeling of regaining a loved one, you guys. I have never felt anything so amazing in my life. So, even though I am sure Logan would be mortified if he ever read this, I just had to share and document such a powerful feeling. Don't give up hope. If you keep working at it, even though it seems hopeless, it will come around eventually.
I love you all so much, and I am so grateful for your part in my life. I am sure you don't realize what an impact you have on me, but thanks for being there for me anyway!

It just keeps on getting better....

So, yesterday Jason had a mandatory meeting at work. I wasn't too worried, since they have those meetings every year to discuss per diem and mileage rates. But then Jason called me, and the whole company is basically going under. They are keeping a few people to try and stick around, but it's very unstable. Jason was told that they could keep him for one month at three-quarter pay minus the per diem and mileage rates, and that was it. Jason had kind of seen it coming, so he wasn't too surprised, but his job is the kind that fluctuates quite a bit in stability, so I thought it was just more of the same. I was pretty surprised. Especially since Jason has been working there the longest, so I would have thought that he would be one of the last to be let go. Not that I hold a grudge for those who are staying, nobody really has it great and I know that Steve (the boss) probably prayed about it and whatnot (the joys of working inUtah- everybody's LDS), but I was just surprised.
I am pretty concerned about insurance. I guess that is my big issue. We can go on unemployment, and Jason has been working somewhat on starting his own company. I know we won't be starving and homeless or anything, but it will be a big change. The insurance has me quite worried. I am not sure what direction to move in... It's very frustating, needless to say.
Plus, Jason has been working this job for three years, and we have become quite accustomed to spending half of the week apart. That's when I get all my chores done and errands run. If he is home all day, and I am home all day, I am not sure how that is going to work out. I will, of course, be grateful that we will get to spend more time together, but when will I get anything done? I guess we'll get a schedule going after a few slovenly weeks.
All in all, I know that Heavenly Father will take care of us. We have been living the gospel, and while I know that's not a guarantee of easy life, I know he will bless us with what we need. I am so grateful that I have the gospel as an anchor in my life. I don't know how anyone does life at all without it.